First in a series of articles about my six guiding tenets. These core principles act as an anchor when I feel myself drifting off my path and away from my purpose.
In sharing my experience of navigating the uncertainty of the world and an uncharted path, I hope you feel less alone navigating yours.
#1 Sit in Your Discomfort
Never Run From A Bear
They say if you ever encounter a bear in the wild, resist the impulse to run.
Disclaimer: I am not a bear expert. I have never encountered a bear in the wild. Please don’t take my analogy as a recommendation. Seek experts in the field and learn more here.
Fleeing a bear in the wild can trigger their instinct to chase you. Instead, you stand your ground and make yourself look big.
Sitting in discomfort — like being face-to-face with a bear — demands courage.
Running away from difficult emotions may feel right, but sometimes, you have to stand your ground and make yourself big.
Pausing in the uncomfortable stillness — while your heart races and your mind conjures up a million horrific thoughts — is an opportunity to learn something about yourself.
Sitting in discomfort cultivates resilience, teaching us that we can endure and adapt to an overwhelming, constantly changing world.
Sit in your feelings. Don’t stew, but feel them to understand them.
But like any practice, it requires a consistent commitment and may take a lifetime to learn.
I still catch myself finding ways to stay busy as a way to avoid painful feelings that I have known for decades.
But in those moments, I pause, take a deep breath, and assess the situation.
- Where are you? What are you doing?
- How did you arrive at this moment?
- What are you feeling?
- What are you avoiding? What does it mean to you?
- What would it mean to face it? What would happen if you chose not to?
Hopefully, I’ve gained a bit more clarity about the situation, what led me there, and what I’m actually feeling.
Then, the fun part! What do I do with this new awareness?
I have a choice to make:
- Keep doing what I am doing, or…
- Sit in my discomfort and acknowledge the feeling.
This isn’t easy. Does it sound easy?
Over time, I can catch myself closer to the origin of the discomfort before I get too far in avoidance.
Like building muscle, you will start to feel stronger, experiencing the compounding effect of these tiny moments of awareness.
You may discover greater empathy for the people in your life and approach the world’s complexities with ease — open arms and a willing heart.
It might even spread to the people in your life! Can you imagine everyone close to you taking time to sit in their feelings? Not stew in them but, feel them to understand them.
So, now what?
The next time you catch yourself avoiding an important task, conversation, or one of the many life stressors, you pause and reflect.
Try asking yourself at least one of the questions above.
See how close you can get to the edge of understanding your discomfort.
Oh, and don’t worry too much. You don’t have to linger for too long.
And hey, at least it’s not a bear.
In sharing my experience, I hope you feel less alone in yours.
Throughout my 40+ years of lived experience, there are six guiding tenets that encapsulate my approach to personal growth and interaction with the world.
These principles act as an anchor when I feel myself drifting off my path and away from my purpose.
- Sit in Your Discomfort (this article)
- Embrace Boredom
- Be Curious
- Connection Beyond Conflict
- Surrender to Uncertainty
- Value Creativity over Consumption
These principles are vital reminders for me that encourage a thoughtful, empathetic, and authentic way of living.
They serve as my compass, guiding me through challenges and inspiring a deeper connection with my lived experience — from interpersonal relationships and work to personal development and self-expression.
Join me in exploring the principles that help me navigate the world.
I’ll introduce you to each of them through insightful reflections, pulling back the curtain to show how I actualize them, and we’ll see what we learn along the way.
If you’re seeking thoughtful company amid change and swirling possibilities, I invite you to dive into these reflective conversations with me — they might unveil new inner clarity.
Share your takeaways and feedback in the comments!
And if you’re ready for part 2, this is for you:
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About the Author
Eric Kerr integrates A.I. and a lifetime of personal and professional experience into his work as a creative consultant, integrative coach working with adults with ADHD, artist, writer, and workplace design strategist.
He approaches A.I. technology with a healthy level of skepticism and excitement.
A Human in the Loop represents his ongoing exploration of A.I. and the human experience.
He currently lives in Los Angeles.
